What does it mean…
I am home. After 4 months of living in Italy, I have reached my summer break bringing me into the arms of my love. As I catch up with friends, inevitably I am asked, “How is Italy?” Of course I mention the wonderful food, the lifelong friends I have made, the immense knowledge I am gaining and the beauty that surrounds me every day. To some I mention the difficulty in living abroad, living away from my husband, and the growing pains I have faced. To some I elaborate on the funny and mostly awkward moments that come from being a foreigner. And to some I just say, “amazing”. There is no true reason for this separation in responses, it just seems to happen. It is as if I can’t say it all so I highlight whatever portion is on my mind at that moment. Usually, the question following “how is Italy?” is “how is it to be back?”. This question, is somehow more complicated. It feels like I never left yet that I am returning a different person resulting in a duality that leaves me tongue tied. Most likely, it will take me several years to truly be able to answer those questions. Embarking on such an adventure has allowed me the freedom to do some wonderful soul searching but it is in the past week of being home that I have had some clarity.
During this week I have watched as my love has prepared for a pop up featuring all local products. He has done a few pop up’s in the past but this one received more attention from the community and as doors opened the reservation book was full. You could feel the energy in the restaurant as staff geared up for game time. Since I am on vacation, I found myself able to join in to take pictures and chronicle this experience. Typically at these events I arrived after work, distracted by thoughts of to do lists struggling between a balance of being far away and present. During this week however, I was present and had the opportunity to truly support my hubby allowing me to realize one thing… I am a restaurant wife through and through. I may not be able to answer “how it is to be back” or “how Italy is” but I can explain the part of me that is a wife. It is the part that…
Is constantly ironing chef coats and aprons
Never use a dull knife at home because Kevin sharpens them every week
Goes foraging
Wipes down the sink in the restaurant’s bathroom and picks up litter in the parking lot, confusing 99% of guests as they watch some woman in what appears to be OCD tendencies
Eats yogurt that tastes like smoke because my husband kept the smoked peaches and smoked rib eyes and smoked water in the fridge over night
The person that accepts the boxes of rennet and curing salt that are delivered at home
Listens to chef biographies on long road trips
Has regulars that I have never met know everything about me…my husband is a talker
Takes negative reviews personally
Walks through the back of the restaurant and sees appliances from home that usually I was just looking for
Eavesdrops on the tables next to me to make sure they are having a good time
Calls 6 grocery stores and drives around town for an hour because Kevin needs horseradish for a dish
Watches my mother in law finally sign up for facebook to help vote for the restaurant in the final hours of local newspaper competition
Is sleeping on the couch when my husband gets home late
Visits him at the restaurant to sneak in a kiss before the dinner rush
Mostly, it is the part of me that has the opportunity to watch the person I love do what they love. A gift that not everyone can experience, but as the wife of a chef, I get to see my husband behind the line intensely focused with passion in his eyes. It is a look that fills me with pride.
I may only be in Tucson for one month but watching him this past week I know to my core that I am exactly where I want to be. Now, its time to tackle other questions…
One Response to “What does it mean…”
Awesome awesome post!!! Miss you!!!
By the way, are you free on Friday the 16th? Remind me your street mailing address again? I lost a lot of contacts in my phone 😦